I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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