There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
