This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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