just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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