Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
