i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
