I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
even my farts smell like vagina
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
