this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
So vagazzling was a success
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize