is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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