There is no way he is gay with that hair.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
