I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
