i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
