uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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