it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
