Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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