What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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