I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
