ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
