I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
