I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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