whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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