I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
