have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
