if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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