shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
