I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
