I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
