I'm pants shitting drunk right now
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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