We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize