i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
