dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
