dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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