I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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