i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
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