Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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