Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I'm really busy with my period
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