So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Ladies don't puke and tell
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize