he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Randomize
