We're facebook friends in real life
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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