I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
