oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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