Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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