i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
