id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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