The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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