I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
