Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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