Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
You're my little dorito
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
