At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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