At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
